Metroid Prime 2 Review

Console: GameCube

Publisher: Nintendo

Metroid Prime 2: Echoes Story

If you really need me to tell you about the back story, you should go play one of the ten thousand predecessors to this game, but since I am “on the clock” in a matter of speaking, I’ll do my best. Okay, here it goes: You play as this wicked hot bounty hunting femme-fatale, Samus Aran, who you actually wouldn’t know was hot unless you played some of the old school games, because in the Gamecube additions, Samus takes her battle armor off for no man. Leave it to Nintendo to give you this beautiful environment, graphics to die for, action for days, and still hold out when it comes to voice acting. That’s right, Samus doesn’t talk… still. It’s okay though, because Metroid Prime 2 has kind of taken a turn towards repetition, and if we break the cycle now, the entire universe could fall into a black hole or something. deep breath

Okay, so the story in this one is all about Chozo Lore and Space Pirates. You find yourself stranded on some foreign planet… stop me if you’ve heard this one before… and they've found yet another lame excuse to have all of the abilities Ms. Aran learned in the last game sucked away through mysterious forces. If it sounds familiar, it’s because this is the same story Nintendo has been dropping on us since the 80’s. They always tease you with minor development, and you usually have to play through to the end to get it, but I would love to see this mystery get busted up like a high school kegger before I lose interest.

Playing the Game

Again, if you’ve played the first game, you know what you’re in for, but that doesn’t mean it’s bad, it just means that I’m bitter. Playing Metroid Prime 2: Echoes was actually a blast, and they did add some challenging aspects to the play of it by having you switch between the light and dark versions of an alternate world. You still have your scan visor, and you can gather data on literally everything around you, which really immerses you in the beautiful landscapes this game has to offer. After a while, I lost interest with the Pokemon Photography portion of the game and got down to what I does best; run like hell from those energy sucking Metroids, screaming a slew of profanity that would make Andrew Dice Clay blush, while simultaneously convincing every neighbor on the city block to call the police to come to my rescue. Maybe it’s just my childhood roots, stuck in the memory of being chased by those bastards in the original, but even the baby Metroids make me mess myself from time to time.

What Did We Learn From This?

Despite the extreme sensation of déjà vu you will experience playing this game, the old adage holds true: “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” But, I don’t think that means you should beat it with a bloody hammer and wait for its ghost to rise from the grave and suffocate you in your sleep either, so Nintendo be warned. You should play Metroid Prime 2, no matter what you have to do to get your hands on it, but we’ve been buying their installments to this series for nearly twenty years now, and while we don’t want them to stop, I think fair is fair. We don’t have to take this abuse forever. I mean, we will. But we don’t have to. Oh yeah, and Metroids are Nintendo’s scariest creation ever--aside from Mario Party 1 through 6.